It's March if y'all can believe that. Yeah, just have to say what almost every newscaster across the country has to say whenever we enter a new month. I mean, it was just yesterday when it was still 2022 and we were excited about the movie. Now...well, it's a quiet year so far other than fearing the potential of possible human extinction because we can't get fucking along. But with us entering March meaning that we’re now at or pass through the halfway mark of the season and I dunno man, Season 13 so far, had a few good episodes like Plight and Show Mama, the episodes have been ranging from average to mid with a few that are...well...needs improvement and saying it in the nicest way possible. Halfway through the season and we only got two, or three months until the hiatus.
In this week's episode of Bob's Burgers, it's once again a Tina episode with her stalking a group of cool kids and like the lost puppy that she is, wanting to be a part of that said crowd, you know, blend in and not make an ass for herself while Louise and Gene...yeah, they have a competition over socks...yeah, that's the subplot. That is the subplot in my spoilerific review of the fourteenth episode of Season 13 of Bob’s Burgers, titled “These Boots Are Made for Stalking”.
When it comes to the life of a teenager, either we lived through it or somehow came across this page and you should be studying, that is one of the items on the list of what to do to spend the rest of your young lives before heading off to college and adulthood. No, we're talking about going to college or what to do later in life like a job profession. It’s popularity. The need of wanting to be around a group and to be noticed. I don’t know shit about the world of sociology but when you’re at that age, that's pretty much the common goal in your teen life and that is exactly what Tina is diving for in this week's episode. By all means by stalking around the group of teens who dropped by at the restaurant a few times and want to play it cool without making an ass of yourself. And hopefully, that doesn't result in a potential lawsuit waiting to happen against Tina.
Might as well say that this could be Tina's personality in the modern version of the show when reeling through the struggles of being a teenager, being a lost puppy. Sure, I'd say that over on the Discord chat a few times regarding Tina's social circle she often acts like the lost puppy where whenever you're out and about and you came across the animal, and decides to follow you wherever you go. That might as well describe Tina when it comes to her social life. That's mostly because of the likes of Tammy, Jocelyn, Jimmy Jr, and Zeke whenever they're around and have been saying it since around Season 11, probably when "Vampire Disco Death Dance" came out that she needs better friends because the people she got...eh. But at least she's familiar with them throughout the series along with some others like Susmita, Henry, Darryl, etc. But the group of four people that Tina somehow stumbled upon that may or may not be of high school age, that's the group that Tina is eying on in hopes of wanting to be noticed. Lost puppy mentality.
Now, leave it to Lindsey Stoddart, the person behind the writing of the episode on a story about a teenage girl going through some struggles in her life. You take a look at the Central Park episode that she wrote, “The Paige-riarchy” with Molly getting her first period one morning and her mother Paige trying to convince her daughter that she should treat it as a blessing and as a sign of womanhood. Even though she kind of went a tad overboard by hosting a party to "celebrate" it and might've embarrassed Molly before telling her daughter her first experience while on a family trip. Now in this episode, it's Tina with her struggles of wanting to blend in and I gotta say...Christ, that was hard to watch like driving a car, taking the wrong turn, and driving off the cliff. Might as well break the episode down on why I have to say that and we all saw what happened when watching the episode, this is "These Boots Are Made for Stalking".
And we might as well take the playbook from the likes of one or two episodes of The Great North earlier in the season or perhaps Season 11's "Fingers-loose" with a disaster that is taking place over at a Greek restaurant with Tina making an ass of herself in front of four teenagers with the family getting a front-row seat, in the car, watching is pretty much the biggest social collapse in their lifetimes (for a while). And much like "Fingers-loose" from Season 11 and of course, the likes of "Autumn If You Got 'Em Adventure” and “Mall-mento Adventure” from The Great North earlier this season, we might as well trace back to where we all started when going from the night of the disaster to Tina writing on her diary and writes down about everything that happened throughout the past few days.
The episode actually begins with Tina writing in her diary about her encounters with a pair of teens who came by the restaurant that catches her attention. Her seeing how they dress, how they act, and how they smell for some reason whenever Tina comes to their table to take their order but struggles to even let the pen touch the paper and talk to them when trying to take their order. And like the lost puppy that she is as of late in this version of the show, she wants to have what they have. By that, I mean she wants to be a part of their group because to her, they're popular and she wants to rub herself into that role. Even though the group of teens that Tina's been eyeing for a while might be ranging from the same age as her or a year older...maybe around high school age because they do kind of look a bit older than Tina. Maybe around either freshman or sophomore year in high school is the best bet. Maybe junior year at best. But that's not going to stop Tina from wanting to be a part of the popular group because that is what she wants. To be noticed. Wanting to find her people, even though they can't just appear out of nowhere like a commercial about a product catches your eye. And this is what the duration of the episode is going to be and that is Tina being the lost puppy and trying to impress the group so she can be the newest member of the group. And she is only doing this because she saw an image of an ad for jeans of four people jumping into a lake while wearing those said jeans and wants that experience and imagines herself and the others in that same photo frame.
When I said that Tina needs better friends, I'd say that because the people she got...let's face it in this version of the series, they're not bright. That is mostly because of "Vampire Disco Death Dance" being fresh in the mind and also Tammy being a spoiled brat and a bitch to Tina that sort of pushed away aside...a bit. I'd only said throughout the revival of the reviews that Tina needs better friends because let's be real, the girl doesn't have a best friend. I know that this episode isn't what the talking point is about with what I'm saying and yeah, when you're a teenager, the structure of the social hierarchy is standing right in front of you and planning on climbing to the top, or rather, bullshit your way to the top that it would either blow up in front of your face or did the impossible and reached to the top as if you're climbing Mount Everest. Seriously, who gives a fuck about popularity. You're just fueling people's egos and it can create a negative effect on the person who is at the center of attention. You’re probably going to call me a hater because I’m not popular. Tell that to everyone who’d been hating Tom Brady for the past 23 years during his time on the field. At least I don’t fucking cheat by using cameras or deflate balls to win games.
Linda calls everyone to the table for breakfast with Tina focusing on wanting to be around the teens, already setting up the main plot of the episode and now, the subplot is being set up with Louise coming into the kitchen and bringing out a pair of Gene's socks. And she pulled it out from her room, not the bathroom, her room. She had trouble sleeping throughout the night because of the scent that’s been invading her room without notice until she woke up just moments ago. And the reason why it was left under the loft bed throughout the night was that Louise and Gene were playing around yesterday in a game of parkour where they can't touch the floor with Gene planning on taking off his socks because he rather go barefoot when planning on going on the stairway of the loft bed with Louise telling Gene to not take it off and if he were to do it, which he did, he needs to find somewhere to throw it away. She didn't expect the location of the socks to be under the loft bed the moment she woke up and goes down the stairway and find them by her desk despite not knowing about the smell that's been invading her room. Mind you that her room is a walk-in storage closet. There is no window for her to open to let the scent out. She could've opened the door to let the smell out, throw the socks away, as Bob suggested by either putting them in a hamper or setting it on fire, and spraying some Febreze.
But no, instead she wants Gene to accept some responsibility for his actions by accepting the shame of living an unhygienic lifestyle that led to what happened yesterday that stank up Louise's room to the point where it might as well be considered going against the Geneva convention and label it as a bioweapon. And yes, we're setting up shop for what the subplot is going to be for this episode alongside Tina being a stalker around a group of teens whenever they visit the restaurant. This is what we're going to the next scene after the family finished eating breakfast.
Where you have Tina, acting like the lost puppy that she is, mopping the same area as she waits for the teens to arrive. Going towards Gene and Louise being mad at each other over the sock issue with Gene wearing the sock as a necktie and treating his musk as a badge of honor despite Bob's call to get rid of the sock by putting it into the hamper and Louise to accept the responsibility. What did Gene do? Blasting Louise. Calling her out over not withstanding the smell as if she’s a coward for notwithstanding the smell of Gene’s sock. Though you think that the moment Gene called Louise out over her not willing to withstand the smell of Gene’s sock that you kinda wish some moments from the movie would’ve been brought up from his mouth. With him saying to her, “Oh, so the girl who saved the restaurant, saved the wharf, and turned in our landlord’s cousin/lawyer for killing a carnie and almost killed us can’t handle a small whiff of my stinky sock? For shame.” And Louise would Will Smith slap the crap out of him and you know that she would, but in this current age, she wouldn't do that and instead is preparing to throw her hat into the ring, and thus, we have our subplot. And I think we know what the outcome is going to be for this one. As Louise prepares to possibly regret her decision to allow herself to have a used sock on her neck...
Tina's moment of truth arrived when the teens that she'd been stalking for a while arrived at the restaurant and headed to their table with Tina ready to make an impression for herself to the teens in hopes to be added to the group. Except that once Tina makes her way to the table where the group is at is when she came dangerously close to making an ass of herself when trying to write down their order on the notepad. Technically, she listened, but it appears that she didn't write down their order and instead just listened through their conversation while pretending to write it down almost the same way the government listens to our conversation when being on the phone or the chat boards. The teens talking about a concert that they were planning on seeing later and that of course, caught Tina's attention in her attempt to blend into the group. You know, try to bullshit her way to be a part of a group that she just came across and doesn't know anything in her knowledge other trying to be the fake friend who doesn't know shit other than wanting to be a part of the group and make the people acknowledging her and hoping for comments like "Oh my god, is that Tina? She looks so cool." And "Look at Tina, joining the ranks of the cool kids." And that is all that Tina needs to do in hopes to make an impression and hoping to become the fourth member of the group since only three people are trying to listen to the band that the group is planning on going to later in the week. We already know where this is going, so might as throw in the graphic...
Yep...it’s that time. It can’t be a Tina episode without throwing in the graphic and joke into the review. It might as well be a recurring theme whenever Tina is in focus and it’s about her everyday life. We had it recently when she was accused of cheating by Chelsea in “Cheaty Cheaty Bang Bang” despite that she did the cheating herself, at least she didn’t snitch on her by the end of that episode because she doesn’t roll that way just to save her ass, but here we are once again. I mean, at this point, I might as well be planning to turn the joke into merch. I could pull it off with the “That’s So Tina” joke and turn it into the page’s first official merchandise but that won’t work unless I have a YouTube page or a podcast with a large following. Finding the right site to do the merch unless it’s Redbubble or Teespring. Also money and how much I would be getting in the event my earnings get split with the company. And also hoping to avoid a possible lawsuit from the network.
The day has transitioned to the night at the apartment above the restaurant with Louise already throwing her hat into the ring for the sock debate by showing off her stinky sock necktie. Attempting to be like the subplot in "Dr. Yap" with the jawbreaker that Gayle gave to Gene that pissed Louise off or "Tappy Tappy Tappy Tap Tap Tap" with them competing on whose burger of the day should be featured despite it can cause a case of food poisoning. And just in time for the Belcher family movie night in the living room with Gene and Louise acting like total babies over the whole situation regarding the pair of socks that Gene left behind in Louise's room last night. But that's enough from the subplot and head back to the main plot with Tina writing down in her diary, opting out from family movie night in an attempt to assimilate herself if she wants to impress the three teens that she came across earlier in the day. Even imagined herself in that jean ad picture that she saw with her wearing the jeans from the ad...and hopefully not a pricey one you would find at the mall. And so begins Tina’s shot of wanting to wow the cool teens and if she wants to play it cool with them from now to the night of the concert, she needs to learn the lingo of "being cool". Starting things off by listening to the band on YouTube called The Mud Stains, available on YouTube and Spotify believe it or not, and yeah, the first time listening to new music can be an experience. Especially when you didn't notice that you didn't connect the headphones to the laptop. And this is why the traditional wiring headphones are dying before our eyes.
Going over to the next day with Tina and Linda heading off for an hour in Tina’s quest to become cool to impress the three teens and you can’t impress everyone without, of course, proper adequate. That being fashion, which is what Tina and Linda are heading for Tina to get new clothes to try out if she wants to get ready for the concert later in the week. Gotta have to add some drip to her lifestyle. Leading to the two girls to a discount thrift shop moments later and have ourselves a montage with the song that Tina listened to last night playing in the background as she tries out every piece of clothing to fit her style if she wants to impress the teens that she's targeting to be a part of their group.
And she did by getting her outfit of choice after a montage of her trying out different clothes at the store with music playing in the background as if we’re watching a movie from the 2000s with her rocking a blue jacket, either a jean jacket or a blazer...yeah, I think a jean jacket might be the closest thing to what Tina is wearing over her black shirt. First time seeing her in a black shirt since her witch phase back in Season 7. And also her wearing some flannel as legwear. Of course, gotta have the shoes. So what better way to complete the look is by finding a pair of combat boots? Or at this point, some timbs to wear and ready to go for when the next time she sees the teens coming in her direction...though knowing Tina, the first time isn't easy is getting used to the shoes when coming back into the restaurant. Oh yeah, and there’s the subplot that is in the way for a bit with Teddy noticing the small scuffle between Louise and Gene with the whole stinky sock debate. And yeah, it’s getting out of hand as the episode drags on and even Bob agrees. This is getting out of hand.
Especially when we get to the montage. The second montage of the episode. Don’t worry, there’s another one later on and uh...one that is going to be talked about as we get to that. But for now, Tina is in her new clothes and once again, waiting for the teens to arrive and once again, her being the lost puppy that she is when sweeping the same area by the window and looking out for when her guests of honor to make an appearance. That was one hand of the episode. And then you have the other with Gene and Louise still going at each other over the sock debate where it's no longer a sock neck tie and instead turns into a sock collar as the week progresses leading up to the night of the concert to close out the first half of the episode. I mean, take a look at Bob and Linda's faces when seeing what their kids are doing at the dinner table. They probably think to themselves when seeing the three and question themselves, "What the hell did we do wrong?" I mean, hell, looking at the cafeteria at the school and looking at the background as Gene and Louise continue to do their so-called debate where you see someone in the back moving away from his seat. You'd probably think that he is just throwing his tray away, but you're probably thinking that he's moving away from the seat because he's pretty much in the radius of the smell. I bet the classrooms of LaBonz and Twitchell, the fourth and sixth graders, had to endure that throughout the week and would question the two Belcher siblings...but don’t want to get caught in the blast zone. Also for the eighth graders to question Tina on what she is planning on doing but it was for the best to not question it.
But once we get to the final few moments of the second half of the episode with the montage coming to an end and Tina writing down in her diary about the three teens not returning to the restaurant and questions whether or not her assimilating herself in hopes to blend in with the group is considered a good idea to begin with since the start of the episode. Her window of opportunity starts to close and is about to throw in the towel and call it night...before a few pieces of paper from the notepad from the restaurant falls onto the floor. Ringing the alarm bells in her head about the concert that hasn't been brought up until just now on the night of the event. Great job with the reminder there, Tina. Should've at least put a reminder on a phone or laptop...anything really to remind you. Tina notices that the concert is tonight and begs her parents to drive her to the concert. And she was begging hard to Bob and Linda to get a ride to the concert and even bring in a proposition to do extra work at the restaurant and look and behold, it worked and Tina gets a ride. And before y'all say that she can get a ride-sharing app...she's 13. Pretty sure you can't do that unless you call for a bus at a bus stop. Or at least run her way to the venue but by then, it would be too late for her to make it there. So going by car would be the way to go...even if it means being surrounded by Louise and Gene with a pair of used socks surrounding their necks that I'm pretty sure that not even flies don't want to be around them.
Oh, and Tina missed her shot once arriving at the concert venue because the event was sold out. Oh yeah, Tina was so busy trying to play the long game in trying to listen to the band in hopes of trying to impress the three teens and wanting to clinch her spot in being in that said group...that she didn't even bother getting tickets early in advance leading up to the night of the concert. Online no less. She forgot that getting tickets in advance was supposed to be on the list when hearing about the teens' plans on going to the concert and should've placed an order just as she prepared to listen to the band's song on YouTube for the first time. So yeah, Tina is denied access to enter the venue because she didn't notice how tickets work because she forgot that she didn't get it in advance while learning the nook and crannies about the band that the teens were planning on seeing. The window has closed. And that is more than enough to close out the first half of the episode and ready to enter the mini-review halftime with this week's episode of The Great North for this week. Gotta make room for what the defending Battle of the Week champions has to say for this week.
So, in this week's episode of The Great North, it's every guy for themselves when competing in the annual sausage pageant, which is a pageant...about sausage. I feel like that is something coming out of Germany when the focus of the event is based on a pork-based product. But it looks like the town will be hosting the event, as well as competing because apparently, this is the first time in over three decades. After all, they got banned from competing because of a little incident that resulted in the 30-year ban. An incident regarding diarrhea and of course pointed towards Beef, who once competed on that night where he had the pageant in the bag before his stomach decided to have a rumble down under and embarrass himself in front of the crowd...and won. But that resulted in Lone Moose not competing for the next 30 years. But Beef never got the identity of who potentially sabotaged him that led up to the ban...
Until finding out that it was Brian who did the deed when visiting Lone Moose during his private meeting with Honeybee that he was the one who was behind the sabotage that gave Beef a sudden case of diarrhea...only to find out that Beef did it to himself. Apparently, both he and Beef were the favorites to win the pageant, of course, a sibling rivalry being presented in front of the crowd. Beef wanted to win the pageant so badly but his chances were slipping when he slipped on stage, giving momentum to Brian and becoming the sole favorite to claim victory, and had to up the ante by sabotaging himself to give him the runs to give him the crown. And of course, we have the ban that lasted for 30 years which is the accusations being made against Brian that he was the one who sabotaged Beef. But Beef won the contest despite him bullshitting his way to the top, which resulted in the town being banned from participating in the event. A sibling rivalry that lasted for 30 years until the time the town gets reinstated.
It would make sense for Ham and Moon being the center focus of the episode with them competing against each other and their friends leading up to the night of the event. Sure, originally, they were just going to have it turn into a friendly competition. You know, may the best Tobin brother win. But apparently, we can’t have that with Beef, Judy, and Honeybee as their coaches to the point where Moon ends up being awarded Beef’s old suit, freshly cleaned from the scent of shit, causing friction between the two brothers. Luckily, they did resolve by the end of the episode and were going for the Roller solution in having the two parties go together as one onto the stage...too bad that the town doesn't like that and knowing that it's a guys' pageant, it doesn't bode well with the townsfolk with the two brothers resolving their differences and planning on sharing the costume. Even if it would possibly cost Lone Moose a future participation. Of course, neither of the Tobin siblings won, and instead and the title went to Drama John but the silver lining in all of this was neither brother wanting to relive what Beef and Brain had gone through and also a year's supply of canned sausage. At least they didn't try to kill each other or threaten to give each other the runs...that'll be the canned food's job to do the work.
And yeah, we got the subplot that coincides with the main plot with Wolf given the mic job as the host after failing to convince Mayor Peppers to raise the age limit for him to compete. I mean, that sort of makes sense for why Wolf wants the age limit to be raised, and not for the wrong reasons, but because of the 30-year ban thanks in part to Beef's antics that Wolf, throughout his life, had never gotten the opportunity to participate. Who would've thought that your father's antics to bring home a title would've cost you a spot in competing in the event during the three decades ban. So Wolf being given the job of the host of the event but gonna need something to make it a show and roasting the crowd would be the way to go. And he did get it right without hurting anyone's feelings on the night of the event after struggling to come up with some material throughout the week. At least one of his jokes didn't cause him to run out of town and potentially give Lone Moose another ban. So it's predictable and can be often forgettable but it's not a bad episode. It's mixed, to say the least. So I'll give it a 5 out of 10 for "Boy Meats World Adventure”. So there’s that. Now going into the second half of the Bob’s Burgers episode because...yeah, this is where we get to what is pretty much what is going to be...a possible implosion the likes we have never seen before in the social scale of things.
Tina blew her shot in trying to get into the venue after failing to notice that she was supposed to get tickets in advance while trying to get into the band she's been listening to and trying out new clothes in hopes for her to be in a cool crowd but ends up falling short as she and the rest of the family get themselves a bowl of gelato on their way home. Feels like her window of opportunity has finally come to a close...or so she thinks because fate decided to be a pesky little bastard when the family made it to the intersection and notices the three teens walking across the street on their way to the place of where the episode began. Leading to the Belchers, per Tina's instructions, to follow them and that of course led to the Greek restaurant. Though...what the hell, Bob? Like...what the hell? You knew how to drive for God knows how long and you don't know how to parallel park? Like...bro, who the fuck taught you to do that? I get that parallel parking isn’t an easy thing when gunning for a permit or license but at your age...at this rate, sooner or later, you should have your license revoked. Not saying that you’re old, but it’s getting there. Bob successfully parked his car with Tina making her way to the Greek restaurant and now...we’re at this moment of this episode. The implosion.
Tina's moment of truth has finally arrived when she enters the restaurant and tries to stay cool with the family waiting in the wings in the car across the street in the event things go bad. Attempting to keep her cool when trying to order the same thing as what the three teens ordered...though no way in hell, one person would order three things from the menu and finish all three plates unless it's a cup of coffee, which is what she ordered. Though the last time drank anything caffeinated, it led to her being addicted to the drink, and pretty sure that is the last thing that Tina would need in wanting to impress those three. She makes her way to the table and plans on impressing the three teens while trying to keep herself together by grabbing a pitcher of water and making their way to their table with one of the teens notice Tina as the girl who works at the restaurant and questions her if she is also an employee here at the Greek restaurant, already putting her at a bad spot. Her anxiety levels go through the roof as she pours a glass of water just as the waiter makes his way to the table and then...bam!
And holy fucking shit, she blew it! She freaking blew it! She embarrassed herself in front of them. She had her shot to the goal and she fumbled. I mean...I knew that it was going to be bad and not in the "I warned you. I warned you this was going to happen." But more of "I knew this was going to be bad...but holy fuck, that was bad." Because originally, I thought it was going to be like them acting total assholes and saying that she's nothing more than a kid and only doing this just to benefit herself. You know that is what some of us thought. This is fucking worse. This is a collapse, folks. This collapse in the social scale is one of the worst that I have seen and when I saw it on the night it came out...Jesus Christ, that was brutal to watch. Not since her trying to play nice with Kaylee back in Season 10 that I've seen Tina trying to play the long game and ending up exploding right in front of her face. Case in point, she blew it. God, that was hard to watch and the family saw it from their car. Gotten front row seats to the implosion that is Tina’s social life. Like...no. No, you’re done. You’re done. You are done. It's over. It’s Joever, my dude. Tina had her shot and good god, that was brutal. Not since the Falcons in the Super Bowl I have seen someone or something blew their shot right at the perfect moment to capture the goal. I feel sorry for Tina for what happened but...she doesn't deserve this. She really doesn't deserve this crap. She hadn’t done anything wrong but...fuck. Just...just...fuck. I knew that it was going to happen...but didn’t expect this. She didn’t deserve this shit. She didn’t deserve it. This is one of those things that you might never recover and here we are.
Finally come in a full circle to where the start of the episode is with Tina having a mental breakdown, again, brutal to watch, heads out of the restaurant after making a call with the family and heads on home, wishing for the night to end and pretty much sulk in solitude after what happened at the moment that she wants to forget but will live in on her head rent free. Once they made it back, the family want to check up on Tina and try to cheer up her, of course, all signs points to Linda to do the work. But at least the subplot is coming to a close with a predictable outcome of this being a no-contest between Gene and Louise. So, thank god that finally came to an end but it did result in them developing a few rashes all over their collarbone. That and the scent from the various socks coming out of Gene's closet that wearing a pair of used socks as a necktie or collar should be labeled as a hate crime. Mostly on whoever came across them throughout the week.
Linda checks up on a depressed Tina after going through what was pretty much the biggest fumble in her life in front of the three teens that she tried to impress but fucked things up. A moment that she's not going to live down and again, she doesn't deserve that. We all watched what happened and that was brutal to watch. As if we're reliving the Hindenburg crashing and burning after hitting a pole that resulted in the zeppelin imploding. And even though the morals and the lessons that are being brought up in the final few minutes of the episode sound too formulaic as if we already know it's going to be and not need a lecture. This one I have to give it a pass from the bitching and moaning because again, Tina doesn’t deserve this shit from what happened. She tried to impress herself in front of the three teens but she tried too hard despite her getting into the things they like. Her being fake. You don’t need to be fake. Just impress them on who you are, even though we’re in a world where...yeah, you can still be judged for something you like. But Linda says to Tina that maybe stop trying. Stop playing the long game in wanting to impress someone or a group and believing that maybe someone out there who noticed doesn't have an issue with her. Does it work? Well, according to the montage in the final few minutes of the episode...not so much.
Tina was still moping over what happened last night when we transitioned to the next day as if a part of her, if not, the entirety of her body and soul just died out of nowhere with the family showing some concern about Tina leading to her at school. Still moping when seeing her not doing her work but everyone else. And you'd think that with Tina moping and in a depressive state that you'd think her peers would've noticed and told her what was wrong. Telling her if she's okay. Like...anyone would've go and attempt to cheer up. And I mean anyone...someone like...I dunno, maybe Susmita or Zeke or the unlikely batch of the draw like Jocelyn or Jimmy Jr. Fuck, Tammy would be the last person to think though with Tina going through this issue. No, I don't think Chelsea, I know that she's not there but she's there somewhere in the classroom shot, would be the best help. Oh yeah, the person who almost gave Tina a panic attack over the cheating accusations help Tina in getting her out of a slump as a last resort. Yeah, like that would ever happen. And even though her making an ass of herself in front of the teens last night would be one of those moments that she might never recover from, knowing that it's a sitcom, she has to bounce back at some point and she did as the day progresses after school with her switching music from the band she listened earlier in the week to the band that she's most familiar with. And also back to her normal self with her playing along with Louise and Gene playing with their food, signifying that he's back to normal. So it took Tina a few hours to hop back after a moment that she can't recover from and yet certain sports teams who committed a choke can't? At this point, they might as well be like Tina and just follow what she's gone through throughout the montage. Otherwise, just burn it down. Just burn it down by fire.
But hey, Tina's back to normal, to her normal self, with her, Louise, and Gene refilling the bottles and it looks like fate once again decided to be a pesky fucker when one of the members of the teens that Tina once stalked throughout the previous week arrived to the restaurant to pick up an order. So the individual who is picking up the order is named Sage and she was there when the whole implosion took place at the Greek restaurant and despite the disaster that Tina caused to herself and her stamina, she seems to keep her cool when talking to Sage while waiting for her order. As if what happened back there wasn't them showing pity or they feel sorry for her over the incident. Don't know about the other two but Sage seems fine with it. And as Linda put it, there's someone out there who is impressed despite playing the long game and I guess Sage does fit the mold into what Linda had said to Tina last night. So Tina feels jubilant over her potentially making a new friend with Sage as she leaves the restaurant with the order. Despite the stalkerish nature and her playing the long game that ended up blowing up to her face, there was a silver lining in all of this that resulted in her befriending Sage to close out the episode with Tina writing in her diary. And I would say that because Tina made a new friend that maybe we'll see her again. Except that whenever Tina made a new friend who sees her as who she is, gave her respect, and becomes the sane man, or sane woman to her...never to be seen again.
Susmita is the exception, of course, and she's a good friend to Tina despite having some differences but at least she doesn't treat Tina like crap. But take a look at Dillon from Season 7. She became good friends with Tina...and she didn't appear since. I mean, Darryl is here and there. Henry is here and there. Josh, I guess with them declaring that they want to be just friends. Sasha and Duncan...we haven’t seen them in almost four years. So uh...yeah, this needs to stop. What happened to Dillion is about to happen to Sage after this episode. Never to be seen again. I’m gonna turned that into a discussion piece about Tina’s friendships and who’s better suited for her, huh?
Fuck. Well, if Bob's Burgers is on break, well, both Bob's Burgers and The Great North are on hiatus mode for the Easter holiday...I might as well talk about the whole Tina thing regarding her relationships. Seriously, this stop needs to stop, and let someone who doesn't treat Tina like dog poo to come back. Nothing wrong with Susmita, but bring either Dillon or Sage back to the show. Maybe drag Susmita along for the ride, and bam, we could have a possible friend group. Don't like it? Get the fuck out.
Reaction/Thoughts:
So all and all, what do I think about this week’s episode of Bob’s Burgers? Well, knowing that the internet is divided over the episode, mostly coming from IMDb and Reddit, to be fair, it’s not a bad episode. Repetitive, I know, but this one isn’t all that bad. Sure, if you don’t focus on the subplot...and I guess everything else, it’s not a bad episode if you gave it a rewatch.
Yeah, that was brutal to see Tina blowing her shot at the end of the third act and going into the fourth that made her fall into a depressive state...for less than 24 hours. And yeah, I knew that it was going to blow up in front of her face as she tries to pretend that she's not throughout the week because she wants to find her group and to be noticed. I knew that it was going to end badly...but didn't expect that to be like that. Tina didn't deserve to have her experience a possible choke job after making an ass of herself over at the Greek restaurant. She really doesn't. I mean, yeah, she fully recovered at the end of the episode and yes, she made a friend with one of the teens from the group, throughout the episode leading up to the end of the third act isn't Tina's proudest moment. As I said, this is one of those moments that you might never recover from, but Tina did because it's a sitcom and you can't let her be mopey in a future episode or two.
But besides that, some moments in the episode are okay. Of course, the lesson I have to give it a pass with Linda trying to cheer her daughter up after that implosion she made at the Greek restaurant. The music for the episode was great despite Tina trying to assimilate herself just to make an impression on the teens. And I guess Sage, the person who came by the restaurant at the end of the episode seems to be okay with Tina despite everything that just happened overnight. Though again, kinda wish they don't do that. That is the issue of whenever Tina makes a new friend who doesn't treat her like crap and gives her the respect that she deserves ends up not coming back in a future episode. Like unless your name is Susmita, and nothing wrong with her, I'm for Tina and Susmita being great, if not, best friends, you're doomed to a one-off. It happened to Dillon and it's gonna happen to Sage. Like, seriously...what the fuck? This can't be like with Jessica when we were introduced to her and had to wait until the start of the pandemic to have her back. Fix it. Fix that issue.
Other than that, the episode does have a rewatch factor being slapped over it. I didn’t care for the subplot with the whole debate over the used socks because we all knew what the outcome is going to be with Louise and Gene going at each other. I mean, it was getting out of hand with them putting more socks over their collars leading up to the moment the implosion took place. I just didn’t care for it. So all and all, final thoughts, it’s a mixed bag...if you’re on the internet. To me, it’s not a bad episode. It had some moments. End of the third act and going into the fourth...brutal to watch with Tina experiencing a meltdown as if we’re witnessing a dramatization of the Chernobyl nuclear reactor meltdown. So I’ll give “These Boots Are Made for Stalking”...
A 6 out of 10. But that's my opinion and I wanna hear yours in the comment section below. And tune in on March 12 for yet another episode of Bob's Burgers, and with Tina back to her feet after this episode, might as well use her again in the spotlight with Louise as the two girls venture out to the shores for Louise to find something to wow the crowd for her show and tell in the fifteenth episode of Season 13 of Bob's Burgers in "The Show (And Tell) Must Go On".
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